Coming Back to Yourself: The Gold in Authentic Self-Compassion

The Gold Piecing Us Back Together Again: Healing, Authenticity, and Self-Compassion in Daily Practice

Things in life can break you.

Not just chip or bruise—but break you wide open. Loss, trauma, betrayal, burnout, grief. Sometimes the pain is so intense it feels like there’s no coming back.

But there’s something I’ve learned, both through personal experience and in my work with others: it is possible to begin again.

Broken, But Not Beyond Repair

Trauma doesn’t just mean surviving a major event. It can be defined, compassionately, as anything that overwhelms your capacity to cope and makes you feel unsafe in your body or your world. Sometimes that rupture is sudden, sometimes it’s a slow erosion.

And yet, if you find it in yourself to begin again—if you take even one small step toward piecing your life back together—what was once broken can become your gold.

There’s a Japanese practice called kintsugi, where cracked pottery is repaired using lacquer mixed with powdered gold. The breakage isn’t hidden—it’s honoured. The flaw becomes part of the beauty.

The gold isn’t in the cracks—it’s in the choice to mend, to care, to love yourself back to wholeness.

This is what healing can look like: not erasing the damage, but integrating it. Your healing becomes part of your story. Your strength. Your art.

It not only brings you back together—it makes you beautifully, unmistakably you.

You Are Not Alone

The work of healing is yours—but you don’t have to do it alone.

When people aren’t immediately available—or when it’s hard to find someone you trust—there is still presence: plants and trees, and cats who curl up near your chest. There is the quiet company of the living world. A walk in the woods with birds singing all around you, a cup of herbal tea, the cool fresh wind in your skin—these aren’t trivial comforts. They’re medicine.

Nature doesn’t ask you to be okay before you arrive. It simply welcomes you.

There is scientific evidence that nature supports us in profound ways. Spending time in green spaces has been shown to reduce stress, improve focus, and increase emotional regulation (Bratman et al., 2015; Frumkin et al., 2017). Even brief contact with nature helps calm the nervous system—something your body recognizes instinctively.

So when you decide to try again—when you set the intention to show up for yourself—know this: the universe meets you partway. That intention radiates. Call it energy, call it neuroplasticity, call it alignment, call it grace… your effort to heal is echoed and supported in ways you can’t always predict.

Little miracles arrive when you least expect them.

These quiet presences—wind, leaves, purring cats, warm tea—remind you that you’re not alone. Even if you walk this path solo, connection is still possible. And sometimes, that’s where the healing begins.

Repair What Matters, Gently

We’re all messy little creatures.

We’ve been hurt, yes—but we’ve also hurt others. That’s part of the human story, too. Owning this without shame can be one of the most freeing things you ever do.

Start by offering yourself what you’ve needed most when others have hurt you: honesty, compassion, accountability. Then extend it outward. Apologize where you need to. Listen deeply. Repair what matters to you.

Perfection isn’t the point. Showing up in your realness—that’s where the healing happens.

It doesn’t have to be perfect. It won’t be. But it will be real.

Forget Perfection. Choose Authenticity.

Perfection is an illusion—and it’s not why you’re here.

You’re here to live your one, wild, precious life (as the poet Mary Oliver said). To experience, to create, to fall down and get up again. To compost the past and grow a’new.

Authenticity, not perfection, is what brings vitality. Studies show that when people live in alignment with their true values—when they are authentic—they experience greater self-esteem, healthier relationships, and more life satisfaction (Wood et al., 2008). Being real is not just liberating; it’s good for your health.

Each small act of self-compassion is a thread in the fabric of your return.

My Golden Practices

Here are some of the things I do, imperfectly but consistently, to show up for myself:

• Gardening and houseplants. Tending life helps me tend my own.
• Continuing to study French. (Because growth feels good, and it’s never too late.)
• Making herbal tea. A ritual of care and sensory grounding.
• Making time to move. Whether it’s a walk, stretch, or full-on workout, my mind always thanks me after.
• Eating healthy and delicious food. I’m happiest when it’s both—and yes, I may eat more blueberries than a small bear.
• Going outside daily. Even just to notice the light. Even just to breathe.
• Moments of awe. That fleeting feeling of “wow” at a blossom, a birdsong, a sky streaked with pink.
• Cleaning my home. Not just chores—acts of devotion. Making my space reflect me.
• Listening to music. Letting emotion move through sound.
• Using new words. Because language opens up our world.
• Learning. Whether it’s a plant ID or a philosophy podcast, curiosity keeps me connected.
• Calling in good energy. I imagine myself full of sparkling light—not because it’s magic, but because it helps me remember I’m alive.

And when the big emotions come, I breathe. I pause. I speak gently to myself. I remind myself that I am allowed to feel. That I don’t have to be flawless to be worthy. That I can love myself to bits—so I can show up better in my relationships, with a clearer mind and heart.

A Final Word

This is the work. Not a destination, not a one-time transformation—but a practice.

Wholeness isn’t something you chase. It’s something you remember.

Each day is a chance to begin again. To forgive yourself, to love better, to return to what matters. To live the dream you’ve dreamed of.

You are the artist. The clay. The gold.

And no matter what life has broken open in you, there is still so much beauty to be made.

Thank you for reading.

If you’d like to walk with me through more nature-based reflections, you can explore my photography, guides, and offerings over on Etsy.

For Further Reading

If you’re curious about the science behind nature connection, self-compassion, and authenticity, here are a few foundational studies and resources:

• Nature Experience Reduces Rumination and Subgenual Prefrontal Cortex Activation
  Bratman et al., 2015 – PNAS
  This study found that walking in nature can significantly reduce rumination—a key factor in anxiety and depression—and calm brain activity associated with self-focused negative thinking.
• Nature Contact and Human Health: A Research Agenda
  Frumkin et al., 2017 – Environmental Health Perspectives
  A comprehensive review of how spending time in nature supports physical and mental health, and why it matters more than ever.
• The Science of Self-Compassion
  Kristin Neff’s Research Overview
  A rich resource exploring how self-compassion increases emotional resilience, reduces anxiety, and improves motivation. (Note: Provided for personal exploration only.)
• The Authentic Personality: A Theoretical and Empirical Conceptualization and the Development of the Authenticity Scale
  Wood et al., 2008 – Journal of Counseling Psychology
  This study links authenticity—living in alignment with your true self—to higher self-esteem, better relationships, and greater psychological well-being.